30. So let us remember that to raise grateful children, we have to be grateful. Let us remember“little pitchers have big ears”—and watch what we say. To illustrate— the next time we are tempted to belittle someone's kindness in the presence of our children, let's stop. Let's never say: “Look at these dishcloths Cousin Sue sent for Christmas. She knit them herself. They didn't cost her a cent!” The remark may seem trivial to us—but the children are listening. So, instead, we had better say: “Look at the hours Cousin Sue spent making these for Christmas! Isn't she nice? Let's write her a thank-you note right now.” And our children may unconsciously absorb the habit of praise and appreciation.

21. Military service in World War Il , along with the G. I. Bill and a booming economy, restored well-being; by the 1970s, when Mr. Elder did his retrospective study, the hardships of the Depression were more a memory than an open sore. "They came out of the war with purpose in their lives, and by age 40 most of them were doing well, " he said, speaking of his study in a recent interview.

20. The Great Depression damaged the self-confidence of the young, and that is beginning to happen now, according to pollsters, sociologists and economists. Young men in particular lost a sense of direction, Glen H. Elder Jr. , a sociologist at the University of North Carolina, found in his study, " Children of the Great Depression. " In some cases they were forced into work they did not want —the issue for Scott Nicholson.

19. Scott Nicholson also has connections, of course, but no one in his network of family and friends has been able to steer him into marketing or finance or management training or any career-oriented opening at a big corporation, his goal. The jobs are simply not there.

18. While Scott has tried to make that happen, he has come under pressure from his parents to compromise: to take , if not the Hanover job, then one like it. " I am beginning to realize that refusal is going to have repercussions, " he said. " My parents are subtly pointing out that beyond room and board, they are also paying other expenses for me, like my cellphone charges and the premiums on a life insurance policy. "

17. From these accidental starts, careers unfolded and lasted. David Nicholson, now the general manager of a company that makes tools, is still in manufacturing. William Nicholson spent the next 48 years, until his retirement, as a stock broker. "Scott hot to find somebody who knows someone, " the grandfather said, "someone who can get him to the head of the line. "

16. So far, Scott Nicholson is a stranger to the triumphal stories that his father and grandfather tell of their working lives. They said it was connections more than perseverance that got them started —the father in 1976 when a friend who had just opened a factory hired him, and the grandfather in 1946 through an Army buddy whose father-in-law owned a brokerage firm in nearby Worcester and needed another stock broker.

15. "They are better educated than previous generations and they were raised by baby boomers who lavished a lot of attention on their children," said Andrew Kohut, the Pew Research Center's director. That helps to explain their persistent optimism, even as they struggle to succeed.

14. Yet surveys show that the majority of the nation's millennials remain confident, as Scott Nicholson is, that they will have satisfactory careers. They have a lot going for them.

13. The college-educated among these young adults are better off. But nearly 17 percent are either unemployed or not seeking work, a record level (although some are in graduate school) . The unemployment rate for college-educated young adults, 5. 5 percent, is nearly double what it was on the eve of the Great Recession, in 2007, and the highest level —by almost two percentage points —since the bureau started to keep records in 1994 for those with at least four years of college.

12. For young adults, the prospects in the workplace, even for the college-educated, have rarely been so bleak. Apart from the 14 percent who are unemployed and seeking work, as Scott Nicholson is, 23 percent are not even seeking a job, according to data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. The total, 37 percent, is the highest in more than three decades and a rate reminiscent of the 1930s.